A Business of Ferrets

Jojo Welcomes You
into his melancholy
sugar banana
~haiku


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Reblogged from smilingemoticon
“I have been waiting my whole life for this gif set.”

“I have been waiting my whole life for this gif set.”

(Source: smilingemoticon, via homegrowninsanity)

I like to think of the bits of peppermint candy in my ice cream as the teeth of my enemies.

Just remember you gave up your childhood in exchange for a brick of social obligation that is your phone.

My friend stood up to stretch. I immediately stood up because I thought we were going into a song and dance number.


I found dentures a block from my house. After kicking them over, I grew attached to this upper set of teeth. Turns out they belong to the drunken downstairs neighbor and my parents insist on me giving them back. #WhyCan’tIHaveNiceThings?

I found dentures a block from my house. After kicking them over, I grew attached to this upper set of teeth. Turns out they belong to the drunken downstairs neighbor and my parents insist on me giving them back. #WhyCan’tIHaveNiceThings?

I have a bad habit of approaching online dating as a job application process.

The STD clinic is a great place to meet local singles.